My friends often ask me "Did you meet any cute German guys?", or "Did you find anyone special in Oldenburg?. I was hesitating: should I or should I not display very personal stories about my love life (or, in this case, the absence of it) publicly, but I though "Meh, nobody really reads my blog anyways, I might as well write and then laugh about it in 10 years time"
My life here is like a romantic comedy. But instead of "romantic" lets use dramatic... or, let's say hilarious... or, awkward... embarrassing... whichever you like best.
So, there was no love life ever since I came here. I mean, there was a little bit of flirting here and there, but nothing worth mentioning, really. It's sad, my dears, very very very sad.
To start with, there are 28 students in EMMIR cohort this year, and honestly (you're gonna laugh now) 26 of them are girls. It's just like middle school, high school and Brusov all over again... No guys and lots and lots of female hormones just floating in the air of the classroom every single day...
As usual, I met very nice people (some of which were guys) from South America, and they were basically my party friends all this time. They are great, really. I mean, they welcomed me in their small group, they were very nice to me, and very protective as well. I am very glad that I met them, because sometimes it's just crazy to talk to the same people over and over again. You get tired, you know...
So, I met one of those South American guys in a badminton class. Yes, I play badminton again!! In the same class I also met another person who has contributed to this whole "Laura-playing-badminton-practicing-three-times-a-week" thing. He is Iranian, and a very good player...
Yeah, none of those guys is the reason I am writing this. The guy that I want to write about is the badminton coach. Without going much into details and writing long and overly emotional descriptions, like "oh, he looks so perfect" or "omg, I bet he is such a good badminton player..." or... "I think he is the only Asian looking guy I ever had a crush on..." I will go straight to the point. I spoke to this guy 2-3 times, I was bored, and one day I just realised that I have a crush on him. It started when once he was looking at my game with the Iranian guy, when we were playing a singles match, and I was so nervous he was looking that my feet were trembling and I nearly fell like 4 times... It was embarrassing.
In the end of that day he gave me a very cute "bye" to which I replied, "bye" and it sounded so desperate it's not even funny. Why do I do that, like, all the time?
Honestly, it is very much like me. I mean, every time I have to leave one place, I start developing feelings towards objects, building or even worse: people. I think it is a self-diffence mechanism, but let's leave it for now.
So, one of my party-people-South-American-friends told me that there is a Punk Rock concert at a club named "Polyester" (Seriously, who names a pub Polyester? o.O). It's been a while since my flatmates and I had gone out for a couple of drinks, so we all wanted to and agreed to go, but at the last minute they changed their minds. Since, for days they have encouraged me to be independent and not be afraid to be alone and out there, I decided that I owed it myself to check that concert out. Besides, I was thinking, that really, I should not let anyone's decisions influence mine. So, even if nobody wants to do it, and I want to do it, I will do it! (that's the rule of the year: becoming independent!)
The way there would have been much much easier if there hadn't been that much wine in my veins, seriously. But I got there alright, got in the pub and told the ladies (and I am going to use the word "ladies" losely, because I am not sure if they were men or women) who were selling the tickets, that I just need to see if my friends are there or not, and if they were, I would come back and pay for the ticket. Surprisingly they were ok with it.
I went inside, made sure that some of my party-people were there, rushed (as fast as I could, but it was not really easy) back and on the way I looked at the bar, where someone unbelievably cute and Chinese looking waved to me and said "hi!" (at least that's how I remember it, ok?) That was the badminton guy, the person I expected to see the least...
So, here is where the awkwardness starts...
I was very surprised to see that badminton coach as a bartender. I mean, talk about luck, right?
So, I turned to him and said, extremely dramatically, "Oh! My! God! Hi!"
And then, after realising what I just SCREAMED all over the pub, I went inside, closed my eyes, and started talking to myself, saying "Oh my God, Laura, really?? Oh my god?? Is that what you say to someone who you kinda like? OMG?""
It did not end there. I was Oh-my-Godding the whole party... Like, literally, OH MY GOD!!
You know me, right? You know what an "Oh-My-God" I pulled out there...
It was horrible. So, I decided to go back there and act a little cooler (Psssssssssss.... :D :D :D )
Instead, I just asked for a beer, for which I payed 2.5 Euro.
Awkwardness was killing me, and honestly, the beer didn't help me forget or overcome embarrassment. It made it worse: Oh My God? Really?
The concert ended in roughly 6 minutes after. The South-American guys said that they had class the next morning, but were still kind enough to stay with me for another two hours, which, btw, were not any less embarrassing.
So, I am talking to them about something. We are in the middle of the bar, the badminton guy is right there and I can see him without looking at him directly... Everything is fine.
I was done with my beer (duh!) and went to get another one (of course I did...)
So here is when the alcohol really hit me, I guess, because a lot of what happened that night seem pretty blurry. All that I remember is that I was over-using the word oh-my-god, hitting my friend in the arms, saying "it's all your fault" and then going back to saying "oh-my-god.
(it's weird, cause I am really an atheist, and I don't really believe in God..)
So, other than two horrible encounters I had that night with random strange Germans who were extremely aggressive for some reason, and one of whom really made me almost cry and want to slap him or kick him right you-know-where, nothing particularly good happened, and very soon, at 3:30 am, I came home... ("came" is such a strong word... let's say "crawl... or, no, "made it" home)
The other morning, which started, of course, with the expression "Oh-my-God..." I started telling my flatmates all that happened. They were existed and they encouraged me to talk to the guy, to at least know his name...
On Monday I showed him (he was reading or something, at the library) to my friend (from a faaaaar distance), who made it clear that I don't have taste in men. Well, I really really don't.
So, Wednesday, I went to badminton class, where he was supposed to be as well. I had bought a new badminton racket, washed all my clothes (god forbid if I smell bad. I even put that anti-bacterial spray on my t-shirt, just in case... and it was horrible, because I was smelling like fresh shoes :D :D :D Ridiculous!!)
The badminton-guy was there. He said "hi!" very warmly, to which, of course, I replied "hi.." but my tone was more like a question, as if I was doubting... I honestly don't understand what was happening. I mean, I am always so overly confident, sometimes even cocky, so cocky... and now I can't even say "hi" to the guy?? WTF?!
He smiled to me every now and then, and I was like "oh-my-god!!" all the time (I hope I didn't say any of them out loud...)
So, I started playing with the Iranian guy, as usual, and GUESS WHAT HAPPENED? The guy took his racket, and freakin' joined us!! And he said, "Ich moechte mit dir spielen..." (I wanna play with you) and freakin' came to my court...
Imagine...
I mean, seriously, imagine...
I was, of course, super excited. My feet were shaking, my racket was trembling...
He was standing closer to the net, while I was in the back of the courts. And guess what happened? I smashed on his back...
imagine...
I smashed on his back! I hit the shuttle so hard... and it didn't go to my opponent. It went straight to his back...
I was like "Oh, my god, I am so sorry... did it hurt?" and he was like: "Kein problem... "
It's like nothing goes un-embarrassing... Everything has to be awkward...
And then we changed the court. and now it was playing me and the Iranian guy versus him and another guy, which JJW team as a whole is not really happy with...
And I was smashing... and smashing... and this time, I smashed on his funny-places...
Imagine...
Why? Like, seriuosly, why would you smash on someone's private parts?? O.o
In another 10 minutes he stopped playing and returned to the place he usually sits like a "lion" and watches everyone play.
After the end of the training, I was getting ready to leave, and I was talking to this Iranian guy, who was saying that there was a party somewhere and that I should go... blah-blah-blah... and then I turned and said proudly, that after the massive hangover on the weekend I was not interested in any party... and that I should go back to the library, because I had a presentation the next day...
And, of course, when I was saying that, I realised that the badminton-guy was standing right next to me and I was like... "emmmm... "
He was like "library? now?" ... and I am like "aha..." and he's like "There is a party at Polyester as well..." (no, he didn't say it as "Uuuuuuu... There's a party!! you should come!! It was more like a publicity for Polyester or whatever... -_-)
And, of course. I had to make it worse. I said "By the way, about last weekend, did I say anything... or... em... did anything embarrassing?" (Seriously, Laura, why???? WHY WOULD YOU ASK HIM THAT! WHY???)
He smiled and said "Yeah, you were very funny, because when you saw me, you said Oh-My-God...." and he literally imitated me...
I think I was so embarrassed that I turned red. (of course, you couldn't see that through my concealer, but still...)
It was bad...
But then I was like "Yeah, that was ... em... right... yeah... emmmm..." and I just closed my face, saying "oh-my-god"...
I know it looks sad, but I still think, that actually, our conversation was pretty funny. Then I said "Actually, I wanted to ask you something. Do you know any professional badminton clubs that i can go to? I mean, I am not professional, obviously, but at least to watch some gaaaaames.. or maye try to plaaaaaay... " and he replied rather enthusiastically: "Yes, sure, you should come to my club"
I was like "Emm... You have your own club?"
"haha, I mean not my own club, but the club I play at. It's %!@B#& Strasse" (God, this German language is not for me)
"There is no way I can remember the name of that street, can you write it down?" and I gave him my notebook, and added "Write your name as well, because I am so gonna forget it" and I was not joking, because he really did have a very interesting name that I had never heard before... I still don't remember it, btw...
He said that they have trainings on Tuesdays and Fridays and that they need girls there, and that I was good and that I should play...
He said I was good.... (puppy-dog-face)
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As a conclusion. Having no love life sucks. It sucks even more to create characters in your life (that you are gonna soon abandon) that you don't even know and start having feeling towards them. Not the first time, really... but I am sure I will laugh about it in a short time...
And hey, it's not over yet. I will see him on Wednesday from 19:30 to 22:00 (boy, I am gonna die if I play so much). I will make sure it's embarrassing and awkward, so that i have stuff to write about... :D :D :D
P.S. Oh My God...
